Anticipate Goodbye?

I am sad. Sometimes I try to anticipate goodbye as if that will make it better. Maybe it wont hurt as bad if I try to make myself accustomed to life without you. Live with you further on the edge than closer to the middle.I wish I could close my eyes so I'd never see you leave. Maybe hold them shut to hold you there longer. The sound of your voice. The smell of your shirt. The warmth of your genuine smile. A sincere laugh. A fraction of the things I know I will miss. Trying to store you more indelibly on my heart. I love you. I always have and I forever will. Through our memories we will never say goodbye.

Love,

your Nina